I've had many cravings and opportunities to write lately, but...
Well, I obviously haven't.
Ah-HA! But now! Something that really needs to be said.
... or written.
Whatever.
I just experienced thee best trip I've EVER had! There were so many firsts for me, iced with love and sprinkled with a million twinkles of the eye. I feel alive. I feel happy. I feel... anxious... anxious to get that feeling back.
You see, it wasn't here in beautiful San Diego that I experienced this... "trip"... (I guess that already gave it away... sooo... ). It was in amazing-fantastical-absolutely-perfect-for-me San Francisco!!! Though I've been to this great city a handful of times, it was always as a tourist, on one side of town. This trip, however, was different in all of the best ways.
Let's start from the top.
This trip was, unfortunately, for the passing of a dear friend of my dearest friend. I had only met him once, but he made an impression on me, for sure. I knew immediately that he had a great heart and a delightful sense of humor. He will truly be missed by many, many people... RIP JP. <3
A bittersweet trip it was, indeed. For me, it was a life-changing experience.
First of all, I took my very first plane ride... on a plane... FIRST ONE.... EVER!!! And I was TER. RI. FIED. I cried and cried and generally freaked out until takeoff, when suddenly I became calm. I felt a peace wash over me, and as we lifted off of the ground, I felt every fear and care slowly fall away, slipping down to the ground we were soon unable to see. I began to relax, pacing my breath, and- of course- still clutching my very best friend's loving hand. By the end of the flight, I was geeking out on the fact that we were in the damn sky and cheering as we landed! It was an incredible experience, and though the trip home was still a bit unnerving, I have conquered my biggest and greatest fear of all... flying! =)
So? Already pretty amaze balls, n'est-ce pas??
But no... oh no... we are NOT finished, folks!
I met some of the most amazing people, ate some of the best food, drank some of the best drinks, went to some of the best places, lived some of the best effing life I have ever lived... ya' know, felt happy. Felt whole. Felt home.
Whoa... so what about San Diego?? What are you saying, Shaneil?!
I'm saying I have a new goal. I want to be in San Francisco. Nay, need to be!
I couldn't even begin to describe everything that happened... the laughs, the cries, the new friends, the love, the entire city... it has a feeling about it that I could never begin to form into words. But I know how I feel. And I know what I want. So I'm going for it.
Oh yeah, there's also this guy who's kind of... um... incredible, but we'll totally get into that later, yeah? ;)
No, I'm not doing this for a guy. Calm down. I'm doing this because I have NEVER felt so alive and happy as I did during those four days. Four days... imagine a week! A month! Eeeeeeek!! (Yes, I just let out a little squeal!) A YEAR. <--- This is how excited I am!!! (Hopefully that arrow actually lines up... if it doesn't, just- just figure it out!)
The point is, I'm doing it. I'm in a position to do whatever my little heart desires, and my heart desperately needs to be in San Francisco. It may not be forever, but that's not what matters. What matters is I need to be there now. I give myself until the end of the year. Think I can do it?
... I do.
